Oh brother

Jemma has a blanket/bear named Cubile (Ku-bee-lay) that she sleeps with - and sometimes carries around with her. She's had him ever since she was a baby. He's threadbare and worn - but she doesn't mind. In fact, I think she considers his fraying fabric one of best features. She pulls threads (which she calls 'seeds') off of the raggedy edges and acts like they're treasures. Sometimes she'll offer one to me, telling me to "put it in a safe place."

Knowing how attached kids can get to their 'loveys', I've always kept a back-up Cubile hidden away in case she ever lost him - but we've never had to take him out... Until recently. Not too long ago Jemma took Cubile to school with her, and he never made it home.

We'd had a busy day, and no one noticed he was missing until bedtime... and by then there was nothing to be done but wait until morning to see if one of the teachers had found him. Jemma was inconsolable. The weather reflected her mood, and rain poured down as she stood by the window crying and calling out his name into the night.

It's hard to watch your child suffer and not be able to do anything about it... She kept calling and calling him, her little voice echoing in the courtyard. After awhile I asked if she thought she'd be able to stop crying. I could see she was struggling to try... Then she said simply, "I can't hold it," and burst into tears. That broke my heart. I just hugged her, and finally she said, "I can't stop being sad, but I can stop calling him."

I got out the spare lovey, and she started to cry again. "He doesn't look like Cubile at all," she said. She had a point. They may have been identical four years ago, but now there's only a passing resemblance. So I told her he was Cubile's brother, and that he could keep her company until we could get Cubile back in the morning. After she carried the new guy around for a bit she conceded that she thought he looked kind of similar to Cubile, and at last she fell asleep holding him.

Luckily, the real Cubile was at school, waiting for us the next day. When we got home Jemma examined the two of them together, and then happily gave me the newer bear to put away.

There's never a perfect substitute for something you really love - but that night I sure was glad Cubile had a brother...